There is overwhelming evidence that a stable marriage and family environment is a solid base for career and business success. A beautiful relationship with your spouse enhances your creativity and productivity. No matter how successful you are in the workplace, some instability in the home will directly or indirectly impinge on your progress and overall wellbeing. That is why it is important that you do all you can to ensure the peace and stability of your home.

The divine injunction is to follow peace with all men (Hebrews 12:14). And that will necessarily have to start with your immediate family – your spouse and children. As the Bible states, “Blessed are the peacemakers…” (Matthew 5:9 NKJV). No matter who is right or who is wrong, there is always a reward for those who make peace. In this case, part of that reward is stability in your home.

The famous author and speaker Zig Ziglar in his book, Courtship After Marriage, talks about four independent studies sampling successful and highly paid executives. One study included 1,139 CEOs with an average annual income of $356,000. These men (and some women) were found to share some similar qualities. Top on these lists of qualities are related to stable marriage and family life.

The first quality cited is: Loyalty to their spouse. Most of these executives according to the study were married for over 25 years, and many were still married to their high school or college sweethearts.

The second is: A commitment to family. The study indicated that eight out of 10 had two, three, four or more children, and nine out of 10 claimed their families to be their first priority.

The other qualities listed include: A true love for people. This concern, according to the study, begins at home with the spouse and children. The majority of the truly effective and successful executives were found in the research to be in the habit of spending any and all free time with their families.

Ziglar also cited a study reported in the USA Today which showed that marital problems including divorce have a bigger impact on productivity than alcohol or drug abuse. Forty-two percent of those surveyed call the impact of marital problems “very negative.”

The truth is, there is no marriage that does not have its fair share of friction or problems. The difference between those that make progress, in spite of friction, and those that cave in, in the face of friction, is in the handling of the issues involved.

In all sincerity, your spouse could be the one stirring up all the storms in your marriage. But you still have a responsibility to be in control and not allow his or her misadventure take away the peace and stability of your home. And I believe that should be more important to you than scoring a point or settling scores. In the words of King Solomon, “People with quick tempers cause trouble, but those who control their tempers stop a quarrel” (Proverbs 15:18 NCV). Would you rather not play the fool and have a stable home than play ‘right’ and have your home and life in disarray?

Someone will say, “But I am always at the receiving end.” Well, I believe even that is a call to intensify your prayers for your spouse and your home. Is it any wonder the Bible states, “…men always ought to pray and not lose heart…”? (Luke 18:1 NKJV) There is no situation in your life or home that will not ultimately yield to prayers. So the only solution to that boisterous storm that is always seeking to tear your marriage apart is to pray, pray and continue to pray until there is a definite positive change. And the Bible says the hearts of Kings are in God’s hands; He can turn it to whichever direction He wills. And He will, in Jesus’ name.

Now, it is not every perceived wrong you react to verbally. Most, if not all, should drag you more to your knees – the place of prayers. As you do, the peace of God will garnish your heart and bring the desired stability to your marriage, in Jesus’ name.

Remember, you are meant for the tops (the head and not the tail, above only and never beneath). No offence is capable of stopping you except you allow it.