I recently met a couple who have never had a maid or allowed any in-law (extended family members) to spend the night with them, even when they have babies. This is possible partly because the husband is self employed and is always around to assist his wife. Although I see this as extreme, I cannot hide the fact that I believe there is so much closeness between the couple to the extent that even the children say, 'your husband is calling you’ and vice versa (not mummy or daddy). Can I have a balanced view of this?

Answer:
Although sometimes there are inherent problems associated with in-laws or any external influence, this couple must have definitely made up their minds to support each other and leave no room for any interference.

The husband knows his responsibility is first to his wife and then his children, so he makes himself available and takes his share of the house chores so as to take pressure off his wife. Because they are so into each other, their relationship is cordial. They depend on each other and so you can't separate one from the other; no wonder even their children revel in the intimacy.

However, what applies in one couple's home cannot be used as a standard in another. You have to find what works for you.

Look for ways to foster a better relationship between you and your husband. As much as it might be necessary at times to invite your in-laws over to assist you in taking care of the children, let there be boundaries in place, so no one can come between you and your spouse.

The truth is, you should really be seen as one, united in love by your actions and decision making.